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The Golden LEAF Foundation

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Lessons From A High School Graduation

I recently had the delightful experience of watching my youngest child, Stephanie, graduate from high school. Like millions of parents crowded into school gymnasiums across the country, the ceremony offered her parents a sense of accomplishment and pride for our child. While my eyes were focused on this petite blonde sitting near the back, I managed to observe what was going on around me. I watched the graduates, smiled at other proud parents, and became caught up in this important ritual called “graduation.” Here are three insights I learned from the ceremony.

1. Envision Your Life with a New Perspective

It wouldn’t surprise me to learn that many second semester seniors are only focused on what they have to accomplish that day, with very little thought about what is to come. As with any project or undertaking, when we’re in the middle of it we’re simply doing our best trying to get through. For seniors, projects are due, finals are looming ahead, prom season preoccupies their minds, caps and gowns must be ordered, and the laundry list of responsibilities continues. Suddenly, the last few days of the year arrive and seniors hear that word, “future.” No longer are they quite as consumed by the all-important matters of today and they begin to understand the limitless life that stretches before them. It is only when they really hear a teacher, counselor, school administrator, or friend discuss this great adventure that they are able to look more expansively at their lives.

Why should we let seniors have all the fun? We are given the gift of waking up every morning and deciding how to approach the day. We, too, have the opportunity to see with new eyes. Sure, you may be going back to the same desk you’ve worked at for twenty years, with the same routine ahead of you. But you have the ability to determine how you’ll approach this routine. Will you concentrate only on today with its mundane to-do list? Or will you notice opportunities as they arise, and contemplate your own limitless future?

2. Listen to the Voice of Experience

Like it or not, a regular custom at graduations is the keynote speaker. Madeline Albright gave this year’s address at Duke University while Jon Stewart drew both cheers and raised eyebrows at William and Mary. Some speakers deliver profound messages while others stumble over Robert Fulghum’s lessons from Kindergarten. Either way, students and parents alike know that someone with noteworthy experience will speak at the ceremony. Sometimes, the graduates even listen to what the speaker has to say.

Everyday, we have the opportunity to listen to an experienced voice around us. This person isn’t necessarily a scholar or a sage; they can be your parent, a spouse, a friend, your drycleaner, or even your child. What they are offering to us is their angle, their approach, and a different way of looking at things. So often, we get in a hurry and go through tasks in a mindless manner. How much are we missing by not living in the moment? What could we learn by listening to the voices around us, no matter to whom they belong?

3. Celebrate Your Achievements

There are very few human beings more full of themselves than high school seniors. Dangle a tassel a few inches from their eyes and the confidence appears to multiply. There is a saying that senioritis is a parent’s gift from God because it helps us survive the separation when our child goes to college; we’re ready for them to leave the nest. On Graduation Night, high school stadiums are awash with hugs, praises, and camera flashes. This is how it should be, for these students have accomplished twelve years of education and are embarking on the next step, adulthood.

But why do many of us choose only to celebrate life’s major events; birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, or weddings? Could we not commemorate making an important decision, or simply making it through the week? How about pulling out a disposable camera just because we’re having lunch with the girls and it feels good? What if we focused on the things worth celebrating in our lives, and displayed as much belief in ourselves as graduating seniors? Let our own merriment begin!

I suppose that most high school graduations are behind me now. One child is out of college, and the next will be graduating in four years, or five, or… When that happens, who knows what additional thoughts I will have? I’ll be older; a parent of grown children, and all of us will have more experience under our belt. If that ceremony holds as much pride, bittersweet emotion, and solidarity as this month’s graduation, I’ll get back to you.