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Smelling
the Roses:
Better Living Through Savoring
“Stop
and smell the roses,” people often say. Then
they smile ruefully, because everybody
knows there isn’t enough TIME to stop
or, as my daughter says, to “chill.”
This is the Conventional
Wisdom – and I’m here to tell you that
the CW is simply WRONG. Researchers in Positive
Psychology find that people actually get more done if they
take time out to SAVOR their day. Not only that,
but, over time, people who
set aside a few hours every week are likely to be healthier,
more relaxed, and better able to cope
with the stresses of everyday life.
Why not try it? Give
yourself the gift of Savoring. (Hey, stress is
all you have to lose!)
To start, make
a list of 10 things you REALLY enjoy doing,
whether or not you’ve made time for them lately. I’m
talking about stuff that gives you real pleasure.
They may be things you do alone, or with one other person,
or with a group. Look over the list, and see if one thing
says, “pick me.”
Choose one of those activities that you enjoy.
Now:
Take out your calendar, and SOME TIME IN THE NEXT
MONTH, block out at least a two-hour
period that is JUST FOR YOU. Half a day
is better. A whole day is best of all. Do whatever is needed
to make that time free. Ask a neighbor to baby-sit. Tell
your spouse you’ll be busy. Say “no”
to the half-dozen requests that will almost certainly
challenge your Savoring Time .
And when
Your Day comes . . . GO FOR IT, whether
you’re making a picture, walking in the woods, going
to a movie, or just sitting still. What matters
is that you’re doing something you really enjoy.
These
tricks will help you get the most out of your day:
· Give
yourself permission – this is Your Day. It
is absolutely 100% okay for you to be taking this time.
Leave your cell phone at home, or at least turned off. When
kill-joy thinking comes along (and it will), play with it.
Pretend it’s a stick floating in a stream, and just
let it drift away.
· Keep the day alive – collect
a souvenir or take mental
photographs to help you hold on to this special time.
· Focus –
as though you were taking a photograph, adjust
the “depth of field.” Focus
on selected aspects of the experience and let the others
go.
· Immerse Yourself – Try not
to analyze the experience, just be there. You’re
savoring, remember?
· Tell
the story – Share your experience with a
friend or partner – the joy that’s shared multiples
by ten.
· Write it down. Read
it over as a reminder in a few days or weeks.
When your Savoring
time is over, celebrate! Pat yourself on the back for challenging
the Conventional Wisdom. And, while you’re
at it, why not take out your calendar
and make another date for Savoring Your Day? |