Lessons from Mrs. J.

It is amazing to me how much you can learn from another person when you sit by their bedside and just listen. Mrs. J. was one of my hospice patients. On June 11th she was (I believe) taken straight up to Heaven in the loving arms of Jesus. I could be wrong about this, but you would have a hard time swaying me from the way I see it. I was fortunate to call Mrs. J. my “guurrlfriend” (that is how I said it to her) for close to a year.

Here are my lessons:

Let your light shine – Mrs. J. truly believed that her greatest gift to others was letting her light shine for all to see. She didn’t let anyone blow it out, snuff it out, stomp it out, thump it out, or dampen it. There were days when those around her were in “moods,” but she just kept loving them and smiling at them. My greatest gift was experiencing that light for myself. As soon as I would say “guurrlfriend” from the doorway, she would hitch herself up in her bed, smile broadly and giggle her mischievous giggle. I knew I was loved and wanted. She was determined to portray the love of Jesus every single minute of every single day. This drew others to her. People would drop in and say “Mama, how are you doing today?” She would smile and say “The Lord is good all the time.” I never knew exactly how many children she had, but in the spiritual sense, she had hundreds of us.

Build your treasures in Heaven – During one of our first conversations we talked about a Billy Graham crusade I had attended. During part of his sermon he said it didn’t matter whose funeral he went to, he never saw a U-Haul truck attached to the hearse. In other words:

You can’t take it with you, so what good does it do?

She constantly told me to build my treasures in Heaven and that I should worry more about my Heavenly savings account than any other savings account. It wasn’t too long ago that she asked me once again “So why did you quit your corporate job?” I told her “So I could spend time with you.” She smiled and said “You answered right. Build your treasures in Heaven.”

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream – At the end of our time together every week I would ask Mrs. J. if there was anything I could bring her next time. Mrs. J. loved home-cooked dishes, and “Puddin” (her granddaughter) was the queen of bringing her all her heart desired. I tried in my small way to bring her things I knew she would enjoy. Every week she would give me her order. I would take my finger out and pretend I was writing it on my hand, which made her laugh. Pretty much without fail, I would bring her what she requested. One week she asked for strawberry ice cream. Mrs J. was a diabetic, so did not get “real” ice cream. I showed up the following week with the goods in hand. As I entered the door, I said, “Guess what I have?”

“Ice cream.”

“And what flavor do I have?”
“Strawberry; but did you bring a spoon?”

She always knew I was always forgetting something! But I replied, “Yes, I even remembered the spoon.” I took the ice cream and the spoon out of the bag. She opened the ice cream, held the spoon and then bowed her head. She said “Thank you Lord, Thank you Lord, Thank you Lord.” Tears flowed out of her eyes and then out of mine. “Thank you Lord, for Cari who brought me ice cream.” We all scream for simple acts of human kindness.

Dragging crowns – Mrs. J. never wanted a crown in Heaven. She simply wanted to be at the feet of Jesus and to thank Him for all He did for her in her life. During the last week of her life, I talked to her about being in Heaven and that I was sure the Lord was going to build her a mansion right next to Him. She smiled at the prospect. During our last conversation I told her, “You know I have been talking to the Lord about your crown; I am afraid He is going to give you one.” She smiled and said “I have been talking to the Lord too. He told me the same. I told Him if He gave it to me, I guess I will just have to drag it around Heaven.” We both erupted in laughter. So, if you see someone in Heaven draggin’ their crown around, that’s my Mrs. J.

I am told Mrs. J. died saying “Thank you Lord, Thank you Lord, Thank you Lord” as her hands were raised to Heaven and an empty ice cream pint sat on her tray. “Thank you Lord.”